The ideal for transgender people after they transition is to shed the trans-identity and lead a life as the women or men they were meant to be. After so many years of going to sleep and waking up every day with the soul-crushing ache of living in the wrong gender, then going through the exhausting process of changing one’s anatomy and social role, that’s exactly what I did. It was natural that I wanted to just relax and simply enjoy being the woman I worked so hard to become. I was lucky to have the support of my employer, my mother, and most of my friends, as well as the funds to complete my transition. I worked, dated, cultivated new friends, and was free for the first time to be myself. But, about a year ago with the rising visibility of trans women and men in the media, and the progress we have made, I decided it was time to throw my voice into the mix. My hope is that by sharing my experience I can help foster understanding of what it means to be transgender today in America.
In the 90s when I transitioned, on the job at Johns Hopkins University Applied Physics laboratory, I could not have imagined the progress we would make in 20 short years. It has never been better in America to be transgender. We no longer live in the shadows as society’s pariahs relegated to a narrow subculture, yet problems still remain for many of us. Not everyone is as lucky as I was to have a positive support system and relatively smooth transition. We’ve made great strides but there is a still a long way to go.
The general population has some catching up to do in processing the progress that has been made socially and legally. I was recently appalled at my own reaction to the Bruce Jenner Photo-shopped cover of last week’s In Touch magazine. If even I laugh at this media side-show, how can I expect others not to? That’s an example of how deeply rooted our views are regarding LGBT folk—even for a transgender woman like myself. This needs to change.
It seems appropriate this month to quote Martin Luther King who said, “People hate each other because they don’t know each other.” In the mid-1970s gay activist Harvey Milk put out a call for all LGBT people to come out and show the community that we are your coworkers, your children, your brothers, sisters, parents, and teachers. It is only through interaction and dialog that understanding and empathy are born, and only then can we learn we are all “one people.”
I have been invited by What Weekly to write a column that is intended as a forum to discuss any and all issues related to the transgender experience. Through dialog I hope we can foster a greater understanding of what it means to be transgender in this changing world. If you have ever wanted to ask a question of your transgender co-worker, neighbor, or acquaintance, or simply wanted to know more about transgender issues, or share an opinion, this is the place to write in and begin a discussion.
“One is not born, but rather becomes, a woman.”
Simone de Beauvior
I look forward to hearing from you!
Courtney B. Eckler
